Guest Post by Cherie Burbach, author of Internet Dating is Not Like Ordering a Pizza:

Top Ten Online Dating Myths

Internet dating is a fabulous way to meet people. Even so, there are some misconceptions that keep singles from even trying to go online. Others are a bit nervous about online dating and bring an attitude of fear and trepidation to their online dating experience.

Oftentimes I hear of myths from people who have never dated online! I wonder how people who have never experienced it can give advice to singles who want to give it a whirl!

Do you have some online myths you're holding onto? See if one of these describes your biggest online dating fear.

1. There are only losers and freaks online.

This seems to be the most popular misconception I've heard about online dating. The funny part is that I hear this most often from people who have never online dated!

I've worked with a lot of online daters and I can tell you that the people who use online dating services are regular folks who (for whatever reason) just have not met the right person yet. Maybe they've spent time just being single and getting to know themselves. Maybe they've worked too much over the years and haven't had the time to date as much as they'd like to. Maybe they have dated quite a bit over the years but just can't seem to find that one person that they click with.

2. It's all about sex.

I see this used as a storyline quite a bit in Hollywood, but in real life most people (myself included) join online dating services because they want to meet someone special. They want a relationship. They aren't in it to get a one-night stand.

3. You can't possibly meet a soul mate with the Internet.

A few folks out there seem to think that if you go online, you are going to hook up with whoever you happen to meet, and the implication is that you are not going to meet a soul mate.

I'm here to tell you that is wrong.

Internet dating is one of the best ways to meet someone perfect for you because it introduces you to a lot of people and you can find them by searching for common interests. I don't know about you, but I've had a couple friends set me up over the years and at the end of the date I always wondered, "Is this who you think I should be with?" The people I met through set ups never seemed to have anything in common with me.

With Internet dating, however, I met lots of guys who shared similar interests. One of those guys turned out to be my husband, and we've just celebrated our five-year anniversary.

4. It's expensive.

Some singles balk because there is generally a fee to joining most online dating sites. In my opinion, the fee is nominal when you think that you could be hanging out in bars or joining singles club and spending a lot more money than you will with an Internet dating site.

Besides that, most online daters who join paid sites seem to be more serious about finding a real relationship. All around it's a good investment.

5. It's not safe.

Let me be clear on this: any time you meet someone new you have to be cautious. This includes people you may meet through friends or on your own. Until you get to know someone, they are a stranger to you.

The reason Internet gets a bad rap for safety is because daters feel comfortable with their online matches after they email or talk on the phone with them first. Because they've had this communication, they feel they know them better than if they were meeting a complete stranger. The reality is that even with email and phone calls, your date is a stranger until you take the time to get to know them.

Internet dating actually has many safety measures that other methods of people don't: a double-blind email system, blocking feature, and ability to communicate without ever giving out your last name or other personal information.

6. Everybody will know you are Internet dating.

One of the fears some daters have in "putting their information out there" is that someone they work with or live near will see it. They believe they will be ridiculed simply because they are online and looking for someone special.

While it's certainly possible that people may see your profile, the reality is that the people who are looking online are the ones using the service. So if you're worried that a coworker may see your profile, don't tell them you are Internet dating. They probably will never look online.

7. It takes too much time.

Some daters think in order to Internet date you need hours a day to spend looking through profiles. But this is incorrect. The great thing is, once you get your profile set up, you can easily browse through emails and profiles quickly on your own time. The amount of time you spend online is up to you.

8. There are no singles in your area.

Chances are, even if you live in a small town, there will be singles you haven't met yet online. That's the great thing about the Internet; it introduces you to people who probably live near you that you might otherwise never have met. My husband and I had hung out at all the same places for years and it still took the World Wide Web for us to finally meet.

If you log on to a service and don't see many people, you can always try and different service. Don't limit yourself or give up before you've exhausted all your possibilities.

9. Everybody lies.

I can tell you in the 60-some guys I met online, a couple fudged the truth about their height and weight. Every single guy had a picture and only one didn't look like his. In other words, the majority of people online don't lie.

Sometimes it's a matter of just wanting to be accepted. People may post a picture that isn't quite current, or shave a pound or two off because they fear that if someone read their stats they wouldn't want to meet them. Look beyond these things when you meet someone new. After all, it's the innate qualities of a person that will provide the spark needed to spark a relationship.

10. You only do Internet dating if you can't meet people any other way.

The Internet isn't a last resort, but one of my different options for singles today. The smartest singles out there use the Internet, speed dating, lunch dating, and more to meet the right person. Why settle for just one method when they are several to try? You never which one will work best with your personality, time commitment, and location until you try.

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About the author:


Cherie Burbach is an author, blogger, poet, crocheter, and geek. She loves football and is obsessed with anything having to do with the Green Bay Packers or Tudor history.

A passionate diabetes advocate, Cherie has written the book, 21 Simple Things You Can Do To Help Someone With Diabetes.

Cherie used her experience with meeting her husband online to pen At the Coffee Shop, a humorous look at the world of Internet dating. Cherie went on over 60 coffee dates in just six months. She met lots of great people and one of those turned out to be the guy she would marry just one year later. Cherie's new dating book, Internet Dating is Not Like Ordering a Pizza is available now.

Poets looking for a review of their book can contact Cherie's site, Bonjour Poetry Reviews. A review and marketing assistance for poets is available.

She is the Dating Feature Writer for Suite101, staff writer for b5media, and also the author of three poetry books, including A New Dish and The Difference Now. Her latest, Father's Eyes, has received the 2008 Editor's Choice Award by Allbooks Review.

Readers have resonated with Cherie's honest and inspirational "This I Believe" essay, which is the second-most popular out of over 40,000 entries on the NPR website.

For more information, please visit Cherie's website, http://www.cherieburbach.com/, or her personal blogs: The Difference Now, Beautiful Words, Working Writers, and Ms. Dating Consultant.

Twitter: http://twitter.com/brrbach

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Internet Dating is Not Like Ordering a Pizza
by Cherie Burbach

Book Website: http://internetdatingpizza.homestead.com/

Publication Date: November 2008
ISBN: 978-0-9789747-5-6 (paperback)
ISBN: 978-0-9789747-6-3 (ebook)
Genre: Nonfiction - Dating
6" x 9", Pages: 164
Trade Paperback
Price: $15.95
Cover Art: Cherie Burbach

Book Description:

Have you become frustrated with Internet dating? If you've tried online dating and given up, or even if you thought the Internet wasn't right for you, this book will give you the courage to try again, this time armed with specific illustrations on what really works - from the profile through the dating stage. Don't waste another minute wondering why some people seem to have Internet dating success while you're still waiting for a response to your online ad. Through dozens of concrete examples, dating expert Cherie Burbach will show you how to write an eye-catching profile, search for, and meet the right person online.

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Ms. Burbach has graciously offered to give away 2 (two) copies of Internet Dating is Not Like Ordering a Pizza. Here's how to enter!!

• Leave a comment with an e-mail address or PaperbackSwap nickname for +1 entry (I have to be able to reach you if you win!!)
  
• Follow my blog for +1 extra entry
  
• Blog about this contest for +1 extra entry (leave a link so I can come check out your blog
  
• Add me to your Blog Roll for +1 extra entry (leave a link so I can come check it out!!)
  
• Only US/Canada Residents are eligible to win
  
• No P.O. Boxes

Contest will end September 15!

A Killer Workout (Fat City Mystery, Bk 2)
Author: Kathryn Lilley
Series: Fat City Mysteries (cozy)
ISBN: 978-0-451-22535-1
284 pages

Book Description from Amazon:

"Plus-sized reporter Kate Gallagher decides to report for duty at Body Blast, a boot camp-style fitness program. But then her roomie is discovered with a broken neck at the foot of the climbing wall. It’s not the first suspicious accident at the camp—another woman recently fell to her death during a Wilderness Challenge. Kate knows that losing weight is hard, but now it looks like it’s turning into mortal combat."

MY REVIEW:

I really enjoyed this second installment of the Fat City cozy mystery series. There were lots of twists and turns along the way and it really kept me guessing until the end! This is quickly becoming one of my favorite new cozy series! Can't wait for book 3, due out very soon! I definitely recommend this series!

The Way Home by George Pelecanos
ISBN: 978-0316156493
Publication Date: May 12, 2009

Book Description:

Christopher Flynn is trying to get it right. After years of trouble and rebellion that enraged his father and nearly cost him his life, he has a steady job in his father's company, he's seriously dating a woman he respects, and, aside from the distrust that lingers in his father's eyes, his mistakes are firmly in the past.

One day on the job, Chris and his partner come across a temptation almost too big to resist. Chris does the right thing, but old habits and instincts rise to the surface, threatening this new-found stability with sudden treachery and violence. With his father and his most trusted friends, he takes one last chance to blast past the demons trying to pull him back.

Like Richard Price or William Kennedy, Pelecanos pushes his characters to the extremes, their redemption that much sweeter because it is so hard fought. Pelecanos has long been celebrated for his unerring ability to portray the conflicts men feel as they search and struggle for power and love in a world that is often harsh and unforgiving but can ultimately be filled with beauty.

About the Author:

George Pelecanos is an independent film producer, an essayist, the recipient of numerous international writing awards, a producer and an Emmy-nominated writer on the HBO hit series "The Wire," and the author of a bestselling series of novels set in and around Washington, D.C.
Visit the author's website!

Here's how to enter:

Thanks to the wonderful folks at Hachette Book Group, I am able to offer five (5) giveaway copies of this book!! And, did you know that President Obama took this book on vacation with him?! Here's how to get your entry!

• Leave a comment with an e-mail address or PaperbackSwap nickname for +1 entry (I have to be able to reach you if you win!!)
• Follow my blog for +1 extra entry
• Blog about this contest for +1 extra entry (leave a link so I can come check out your blog)
• Add me to your Blog Roll for +1 extra entry (leave a link so I can come check it out!!)
• Only US/Canada Residents are eligible to win
• No P.O. Boxes!

Contest will end on September 15! Winners will be selected on September 16!

Thank you to everyone who entered my contest for a chance to win a copy of Friends Like These by Danny Wallace!

Thank you to everyone who entered my contest for Cult Insanity by Irene Spencer!!

I have entered everyone's entries into random.org and the five lucky winners are:



1. Zia (ziaria(at)gmail(dot)com)
2. etirv (delilah0180(at)yahoo(dot)com)
3. Valorie (morbidromantic(at)gmail(dot)com)
4. Esme (chocolateandcroissants at yahoo dot com)
5. Tonya (tonyaharmati at gmail dot com)

CONGRATULATIONS!! E-mails have been sent to all the winners. Each person will have 48 hours to respond to my message or I'll have to draw another winner!!

Thanks so much to everyone who entered!! This was a great contest!! And, a HUGE thank you goes to Hachette Book Group for providing me with the books for this contest!!

Description from Amazon:

Description from Amazon:

Description from Amazon:

Book Description:

Laura Wiess, the acclaimed author who once brought us "a girl to walk alongside Harper Lee's Scout and J. D. Salinger's Phoebe" (Luanne Rice), brings us another memorable young woman, this one at the center of an extraordinary novel of how love ends, how it begins, and what it's worth to protect it...

All Hanna's wanted since sophomore year is Seth. She's gone out with other guys, even gained a rep for being a flirt, all the while hoping cool, guitar-playing Seth will choose her. Then she gets him -- but their relationship is hurtful, stormy and critical, not at all what Hanna thinks a perfect love should be. Bewildered by Seth's treatment of her and in need of understanding, Hanna decides to fulfill her school's community service requirement by spending time with Helen, her terminally ill neighbor, who she's turned to for comfort and wisdom throughout her life. But illness has changed Helen into someone Hanna hardly knows, and her home is not the refuge it once was. Feeling more alone than ever, Hanna gets drawn into an audiobook the older woman is listening to, a fierce, unsettling love story of passion, sacrifice, and devotion. Hanna's fascinated by the idea that such all-encompassing love can truly exist, and without her even realizing it, the story begins to change her.

Until the day when the story becomes all too real...and Hanna's world is spun off its axis by its shattering, irrevocable conclusion.

About the Author:

Laura Wiess is the author of the critically acclaimed novels Such a Pretty Girl, chosen as one of the ALA's 2008 Best Books for Young Adults and 2008 YALSA Quick Picks for Reluctant Readers, and Leftovers. Originally from Milltown, New Jersey, she traded bumper-to-bumper traffic, excellent pizza, and summer days down the shore for scenic roads, bears, no pizza delivery, and the irresistible allure of an old stone house surrounded by forests in Pennsylvania's Endless Mountains Region. Email Laura Wiess at laura@laurawiess.com or visit http://www.laurawiess.com/ for more information.

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Guest Post by the author, Laura Wiess:

Where did the idea for How It Ends come from?

How It Ends began when I was wondering about the way love begins, what we go into it hoping for or dreaming of, what we defend and what we surrender, what we barter or overlook to stay in love, what happens if the love is strong and good and satisfying enough to grow, and then how it ends.

I was also wondering about the secrets people keep hidden in their hearts, and how haunting it is to be left with unanswered questions, things that come to light after a loved one is gone that you can now never get an answer to.

So while I'm mulling over these intertwined questions, several disturbing images I'd been carrying around for years resurfaced and wove themselves in, too.

One image came from one of the stories my mother used to tell me, about when she was a little girl in the 1940s. She lived in a neighborhood where all the kids used to play out in the street, and although no one talked much about the kinds of men who offered candy to children, all the kids were warned by their parents not to go near this one house on the block where an old man and his invalid wife lived, especially if it was dusk or he called you into his garage for any reason.

The local kids ran away from this guy whenever he beckoned but one day there was a new girl of about fifteen living there, an orphaned state kid, placed with them to live. She was rarely allowed to come out and play, and did not even go to school. So whatever happened to this girl?

How It Ends was born of these questions, and is the story of Hanna, a teen searching for love, Helen, her beloved, terminally-ill neighbor, and the sharing of something real, and good, and true.

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Make sure you check out all of these stops on the blog tour for How It Ends!

My Book Views: http://my-book-views.blogspot.com/
Book Soulmates: http://booksoulmates.blogspot.com/
A Journey of Books: http://ajourneyofbooks.blogspot.com/
Just Jennifer Reading: http://justjenniferreading.blogspot.com/
Debbie’s World of Books: http://debbiesworldofbooks.com/
All About {n}: http://www.bookwormygirl.blogspot.com/
Chick with Books: http://chickwithbooks.blogspot.com/
Bookin’ with Bingo: http://bookinwithbingo.blogspot.com/
Starting Fresh: http://startingfresh-gaby317.blogspot.com/
Booksie’s Blog: http://booksiesblog.blogspot.com/
Readaholic: http://bridget3420.blogspot.com/
Blog Business World: http://www.blogbusinessworld.blogspot.com/
Books and Needlepoint: http://booksandneedlepoint.blogspot.com/
Bella’s Novella: http://www.bellasnovella.com/
Frugal Plus: http://frugalplus.com/
Eclectic Book Lover: http://www.eclecticbooklover.com/
My Own Little Corner of the World: http://molcotw.blogspot.com/
Chick Loves Lit: http://www.chickloveslit.blogspot.com/
Poisoned Rationality: http://lastexilewords.blogspot.com/
So Many Books, So Little Time: http://purplg8r-somanybooks.blogspot.com/
Beth’s Book Review Blog: http://bethsbookreviewblog.blogspot.com/
Park Avenue Princess: http://aparkavenueprincess.blogspot.com/
Half Deserted Streets: http://www.halfdesertedstreets.com/
Power in the Blog: http://jesharris.wordpress.com/
Metroreader: http://metroreader.blogspot.com/
Crazy for Books: http://crazy-for-books.blogspot.com/
Angieville: http://angieville.blogspot.com/

Description from Amazon:

"Mystery writer and dabbling recreational sleuth Sophie Katz is head over heels in love—with a three-bedroom Victorian. She's just got to have it, despite a few drawbacks. Her slimy ex is the Realtor. The rich, creepy seller wants her to join San Francisco's spirited Specter Society. And her first tour of the house reveals, well, a lifeless body clutching a cameo with a disturbing history of its own.

There's no way Sophie is going to give up the ghost on her dreams of stained glass and original woodwork, though—even when things become officially weird. A Society member is found with a slashed throat, and Sophie's house might as well be yelling, "GET…OUT!" She's hearing footsteps, lights are turning themselves off and her stuff keeps moving inexplicably. To top it off, boyfriend Anatoly thinks it's all in her head.

Sophie is 99 percent sure her problems are caused by someone six feet tall instead of six feet under, but the only way to be sure is to track down the killer—before he pushes her kicking and screaming to the other side…."

MY REVIEW:

I have loved the entire Sophie Katz chick-lit mystery series and this one is no different! I'm not sure where the author came up with this storyline, but it was definitely unique!!! I really enjoyed this book, although it was quite strange! It is really funny how Sophie manages to get herself into all these crazy predicaments, but I enjoy "seeing" how she gets herself out! I highly recommend this series for a light, fun, mystery.

I am on the lovely beaches of the Outer Banks of North Carolina this week, so I apologize for my delay in getting reviews posted!! I am in dire need of a vacation with lots and lots of books, so I'm so thrilled to be here!! :)

Book Description from Amazon:

"As San Francisco's most glamorous millionaires mingle at the party of the year, someone is watching--waiting for a chance to take vengeance on Isa and Ethan Bailey, the city's most celebrated couple. Finally, the killer pinpoints the ideal moment, and it's the perfect murder. Not a trace of evidence is left behind in their glamorous home.

As Detective Lindsay Boxer investigates the high-profile murder, someone else is found brutally executed--a preacher with a message of hope for the homeless. His death nearly falls through the cracks, but when reporter Cindy Thomas hears about it, she knows the story could be huge. Probing deeper into the victim's history, she discovers he may not have been quite as saintly as everyone thought.

As the hunt for two criminals tests the limits of the Women's Murder Club, Lindsay sees sparks fly between Cindy and her partner, Detective Rich Conklin. The Women's Murder Club now faces its toughest challenge: will love destroy all that four friends have built?"

MY REVIEW:

I finished 8th Confession by James Patterson on my way down to the beach and it was another fast-paced read! I found the storyline with Yuki and her new love interest to be very lame and out of left-field. I didn't get what the point of it was! Other than that, it was a quick read, but with not a lot of substance. I'd give it 3.5/5 stars.

From Amazon.com:

"A terrible fire in a wealthy suburban home leaves a married couple dead and Detective Lindsay Boxer and her partner Rich Conklin searching for clues. And after California's golden boy, Michael Campion, has been missing for a month, there finally seems to be a lead in his case--a very devastating lead.

As fire after fire consume couples in wealthy, comfortable homes, Lindsay and the Murder Club must race to find the arsonists responsible and get to the bottom of Michael Campion's disappearance. But suddenly the fires are raging too close to home.

Frightened for her life and torn between two men, Lindsay must find a way to solve the most daunting dilemmas she's ever faced--at work and at home."

MY REVIEW:

After being slightly disappointed with The 6th Target, I was hoping for a better effort in 7th Heaven. I was not disappointed. This is a fast moving story that will leave the reader guessing at every turn. This is another book with two separate cases happening (missing person presumed dead and an arsonist targeting wealthy couples), but I didn't feel disconnected as I did with the previous book in the series. The end was truly a shocker and reminds me of the Patterson I know and love! GREAT read and definitely recommended!!!

I can't wait to crack open 8th Confession, which is up next in my TBR! I am very anxious to see what happens with Lindsay's love triangle! I really love the characters the author has created in this series - you feel like they are your friends and become engaged in their lives! I highly recommend this series!!

Description from Amazon:

"When a horrifying attack leaves one of the four members of the Women's Murder Club struggling for her life, the others fight to keep a madman behind bars before anyone else is hurt. And Lindsay Boxer and her new partner in the San Francisco police department run flat-out to stop a series of kidnappings that has electrified the city: children are being plucked off the streets together with their nannies--but the kidnappers aren't demanding ransom. Amid uncertainty and rising panic, Lindsay juggles the possibility of a new love with an unsolvable investigation, and the knowledge that one member of the club could be on the brink of death.

And just when everything appears momentarily under control, the case takes a terrifying turn, putting an entire city in lethal danger. Lindsay must make a choice she never dreamed she'd face--with no certainty that either outcome has more than a prayer of success."

MY REVIEW:

Ok, so I have enjoyed Patterson's books over the years and while I did like this book, I was also slightly annoyed by it as well. Here's why. There two completely separate cases going on at the same time and the book would flip back and forth between each one, making for a choppy reading experience. I kept waiting for something to happen so it would all come together and make sense. It just didn't happen for me. I love this series and I will continue reading it, but this wasn't one of my favorite Patterson books.

Description from Amazon:

From the author's website:

"Professional psychic Abby Cooper has invested in a fixer-upper, hoping to make a killing in the real estate market. But a killing of another kind puts her plans awry, as the ghost of a murdered woman and some troublesome poltergeists lead her into a mystery that stretches all the way back to World War II."

MY REVIEW:

The Abby Cooper mysteries were the very first cozy series I started reading and they continue to be my favorites! I just love Abby! With her "cell phone chirping" and her "intuition buzzing", it makes for a unique and lively character! There is one small thing that started to bug me when I was reading this book: Abby's boyfriend Dutch and his overuse of the word "sweethot". Come on, Dutch!! Throw in a "honey" or "cupcake" sometime and break it up a little!! LOL!! With that small annoyance aside, this is another great installment to the series and I am looking forward to reading the rest! I highly recommend them!!
--Jennifer

From the book's website:

From the back cover: